Sunday, October 27, 2013


Have you ever wondered "Why do my kids act worse when I feel like shit?" I swear that is what it feels like. An army of kids against you. Especially the first two days when you feel like you are the walking dead. Everything seems 10 times worse, Your limit is reached 10 times faster and you want to go to bed 10 hours earlier. I think Levi and I have the same allergies. We always feel like shit together. Alicia falls in the middle of us and Jon. Jon rarely gets any of this crap. I cheated on my healthy eating today I felt so bad. That seems weird but I will probably be paying for it later. 

Church this morning went well. We got there much later than I had planned. (Story of my SAHM life.) I swear before I became a SAHM I was 15-20 minutes early for everything. I was annoyingly early. I didn't know how to be late. If I left "late" I would still be 5 minutes early. Sorry, back to today. Levi was extra snuggly last night meaning he was screaming his head off at Jon and only wanted me to comfort him (Yay Me.) So one of my nights "off" I got to hold a freshly snotty Levi until he was calm enough to suck down a bottle relax and me put him back to bed. I naturally fell asleep on the couch because if I had walked past his room to go upstairs he would have woken up anyway . I let him sleep as long as possible so my alarm wasn't set for church. I wake up to "MOMMY, I'M NOT WET" being screamed in my face. I say good job, when in my mind I'm thinking, you should be because at 3 am when you peed your bed I changed you and your bedding and put you back to sleep dry. Ugh when I'm sick I still wish I could put her in pullups. I get up start getting Alicia ready for church, which Alicia has two volumes, awake and asleep. Naturally Levi is awake too. Get to church, leave church, come home and make lunch...BANG two Grumpasaurs come slapping at my knees. I put Levi down for a nap but can't convince/bribe/threaten Alicia to take a nap to save my life. FINE, Watch Casper, Justin Time, heck watch Cailliou for all I care (I care I HATE CAILLIOU WITH A PASSION) I just need to breathe and blow my nose without being bitten, kicked, or cried on. It hits me, CRAP I have to blow my nose. This is the first indication that I'm getting sick. I never have to blow my nose unless I'm bawling my eyes out, or I'm getting sick. I dig through my medicine cabinet to find the left over pills and prescription strength nasal spray left over from last month when I had the same crap. Might as well hit it hard. (I also threw in a Claritin and a Tylenol Cold and Flu too.)
I do some Christmas shopping on Ebay, holy cow I forgot how nerve racking it is to actually bid on something and wait!! I usually just buy it now because I hate losing. It is now 3 o'clock and Alicia is screaming at me because she wants "Spadaddy" for dinner. I tell her we start dinner at 6:30 and that she can have an apple for a snack if she is still hungry. She throws herself on the floor screaming because she doesn't wait to wait for dinner and that I am mean because I haven't cut the apple that I just told her she could have. I'm ready to join her. Full on temper tantrum, rolling, kicking screaming, huge tears, throwing crap everywhere, and would have if I hadn't felt like shit. I hate how fast this crap hits me.
Fast forward 7 or 8 fits, Jon wakes up early (THANK GOD) comes down stairs, I start and finish dinner. Everything is ready the "Spadaddy, Garlic rolls, and sauce" and we don't have any freaking drinks. I volunteer to run to the store (HECK YES I GET TO BE ALONE IN MY CAR) I drive to CVS, buy drinks, (FORGOT THE DAMN WINE) diapers, formula and icecream. Turn my music as loud as it will go and drive the .25 miles home. OOPS I bet Jon was startled when he turned my van on to go to work LOL. I don't think I turned it down. Bahahaha. Come home, my Spadaddy is cold snotty Levi hasn't stopped crying since I left, Kahlua (one of two dogs) is in the trash, Alicia has spilled her water and is now cold. Looks like I made the trip too quickly. Get everyone fed, dishes away, husband goes to work and kids are in bed and asleep by 8:15. 

Mom freaking wins.


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